hell yes lets make some ravioli
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
that's an acceptable place to lick
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
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he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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