um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
