ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
