lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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