Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
