Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
