gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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