She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
