please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
