I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
