My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
