So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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