So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
