Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
