There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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