lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
