I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize