dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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