Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
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