So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Randomize
