How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
i love accidental penises.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
