my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
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