My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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