is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
