You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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