Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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