Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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