she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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