No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
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