That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
