there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
