Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Randomize
