Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Randomize
