Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
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