so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
