Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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