just come out here and I will go home with you...
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize