I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
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