Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
