I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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