I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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