nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize