but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
