i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
