You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
