whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
