The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
