i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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