OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
did i just pee glitter
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
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