Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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